Facing suffering and the end of life...

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Homily for the Twenty-ninth Sunday in Ordinary Time
(Scriptures for today's liturgy)

Audio for homily

 

I began my ministry in Concord in March of 1994.

That same week my mother was admitted to Lahey Clinic

for surgery to replace a valve in her heart.

What we thought would be a rather routine procedure

turned out to be the beginning of months of complications

growing more and more serious as time went by.

We had thought my mother would be home a few days after her surgery.

But in fact, she never came home again.

She was hospitalized until her death,

a long six months after her surgery.

So it was on a Saturday morning in August 1994

that my sister and brother and I made a decision

to remove my mother from a respirator

which was all that was keeping her breathing.

Though it had been a long time since we’d had any response from her,

we hoped she might hear our goodbyes

or at least know the touch of our hands holding hers.

I remember the moment when the sound of the respirator ceased,

leaving us in a much-longed for quiet,

broken only by the sounds of a family’s tears,

softly letting go into God’s hands

the soul of the woman who’d given birth to our lives,

whose love was the first we ever knew.

Those months from March to August

were filled with physical and emotional suffering for my mother

and for us who loved her

and who were so distressed to see her pain, fear and confusion.

Hard times for my mother, hard times for us, her family…

Perhaps you’ve lived through similar circumstances

with someone you love.

If you haven’t, you probably will.
Suffering like this visits most families sooner or later.

No one wishes such suffering on those they love

and all of us would do whatever we could to save those we love

from pain and suffering.

That’s natural.  That’s human.  That’s loving. 
And that’s Christian.

But we also know that suffering is part of every human life

so we shouldn’t be surprised when it it’s part of our own.

Our faith has so much to teach us about suffering.

Strangely, some believers are surprised by suffering,

as if they expected that those who believe and live a good life

should, on that account, be spared what others suffer.

I say this is strange because our Christian faith always gathers us

at the foot of the Cross of Jesus who, above all of us,
ought to have been spared any suffering:

yet he’s the One who suffered for us, who was crushed for us,

the One in whose suffering we find our forgiveness and our peace.

Christians believe that suffering is redemptive, which is to say that:

- even in suffering filled with pain, there’s room for deep healing;

- even as suffering may separate us from our loved ones,

     it yields to a deeper union, born of memories of love shared;

- even suffering that frightens and threatens us,

     opens doors to deeper faith and trust;

- even suffering that ends in death brings the gift of life forever.

This is how Christians approach and face

and live through suffering

and the end of their lives.

Just this past week I visited a parishioner in the hospital.

He's been there for nearly two months.

He’s critically ill and even with palliative care,
he’s in pain all the time.

He would like to go home for the time he has left

but it’s unclear if he’ll be strong enough to do that.

We had a long talk about things one ponders as time grows short.

And we prayed together and I anointed him with the oil of the sick

and gave him Communion.

As I was about to leave he was profuse in thanking me for coming

and for our conversation and the sacraments.

But I thanked him for sharing his faith with me

from his bed of pain and suffering.

I thanked him because he reminded me of what we believe:

that suffering is redemptive:

- that even in pain there comes a healing that runs deep;

- that as we take leave of those we love,
     we learn perhaps as never before

   how much we’ve meant to each other,
   how much we’ve loved, how much we've been loved;

- that in the face of fear and anxiety, doors open wide

     to deeper trust and faith;
- that in dying we surrender to life that has no end.

Today’s scriptures remind us that the Lord was crushed in suffering,

an offering for our sins

so that we might have life through his death,
and that the fullness of days be ours.

In Jesus we have a high priest
who has suffered with us in every way

and whose suffering offers us mercy and peace.

As his followers, we gather every week at the foot of his Cross

to receive his Body, broken for us,

to drink from the Cup of his Blood, shed for us.

For through him and with him and in his suffering,
we are redeemed and his peace is ours.

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