NIGHT PRAYER: Saturday 3/18

My retreat director suggested I pray with the story in Matthew 8 where a man with leprosy approaches Jesus and says, "Lord, if you wish, you can make me clean."  And Jesus replies, "I will do it. Be made clean..."  Other translations have the man saying, "Lord, if you're willing..." and "Lord, if you want to..."
I come to you this evening, Lord, wondering
    what it is you might wish for me,
    what you might want or will for me,
    what you might be waiting to give me...
You never pause, even for a moment,
    in desiring what's best for me,
    in offering whatever healing and blessing
        I might need,
    in giving me whatever grace I need
        to be more faithful to you and your love...
Your generosity is beyond my imagination
and too often, in my blindness, my selfishness,
in my inattentive laziness, I miss
    the hints your wisdom offers me,
    the cues that set me on the path
        that leads me to your peace
    and the love that waits to fill my soul
        with overflowing mercy... 

And so I ask tonight, Lord:
    what do you wish for me?
    what gifts are you waiting for me to accept?
    what grace, what help, what healing
        will you give me without cost?

Please, Lord, clear my mind and heart
    of disappointment that saps my hope and trust,
    of doubt that blinds me to your kindness,
    of self-pity that isolates my spirit,
    of anger that robs me of your peace
    and of anything that keeps me from believing
        I am yours, your chosen, your beloved...

You wish 
    nothing but the best for me;
you want only
    that you and I be one;
you're willing
    to give yourself in love for me;
and you're waiting, Lord, 
    with gentle patience,
'til I fall into your arms
    and find the peace that waits for me...

Fill me, Lord:
fill the empty spaces in my heart and my life
    with all you wish me to have,
    with all you want me to enjoy,
    with all you will to be good for me;
fill me, Lord,
    with all you wait to share 
        to make me one with you in peace...
Protect me, Lord, while I'm awake
and watch over me while I sleep
that awake, I might keep watch with you
and asleep, rest in your peace...
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If you wish, Lord, you can heal me...

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