I learned online yesterday that Fr. Joe Sidera, C.S.C. has died. Although I haven't been in touch with Joe since the early 1980's, he was one of the most important people in my life. Let me share that story with you...
In 1978, five years after my ordination, I was given permission by the Archdiocese of Boston to purse an M.A. in liturgical studies at the University of Notre Dame through what was then called "independent self-funded study." This allowed priests to pursue higher studies on their own initiative - and expense. Those who gave me this permission knew that I was interested in the Church's worship but they didn't know that I was planning, upon receiving my degree, to leave the priesthood and work as a layman in the then burgeoning field of liturgy. (Those first five years of ministry in the parish had been both the "best of times and the worst of times.")
Joe Sidera was one of the first people I met at Notre Dame. He was a student as well, pursuing a PhD in psychology. We quickly became good friends and after about 6 months, I shared with Joe my plans for the future. He listened carefully and replied simply, "Would you like to talk about that?" I said I would - and that began a welcome and often intense year long conversation with Joe about my life, my understanding of myself and who God was in my life.
Well, you already know the rest of the story! I completed my studies, got my degree, worked three more years at Notre Dame in campus ministry and in 1982 returned to ministry in the Archdiocese of Boston. This is why, when folks ask, "When did you decide to become a priest?" I tell them, "Well, that was about 5 years after I was ordained..."
Joe Sidera's question, "Would you like to talk about that?" was a turning point in this life that's now 77 years old. I will be always grateful for his friendship, his care and concern and his patience with me as I unraveled and put back together this ministry that has constituted my life and been the source of my greatest joy and satisfaction.
But Joe and I didn't stay in touch. I returned to Boston and Joe went to Kings College to teach psychology. We parted as friends, each of us to where God's Spirit drew us. I'm reminded of a lyric in a song from Weston Priory, "Persons come into the fiber of our lives and then their shadow fades and disappears..."
Learning of Joe's passing over to the Lord led me to regret that we drifted apart - but left me no less grateful for how the fibers of our lives were, at least for a time, woven together.
So, I've been thinking about other people, many people who, over these nearly 8 decades, have come into the fiber of life but whose shadows have faded and disappeared. I'm thinking about all the people who touched and even changed my life - but who have faded in my memory. And I'm thinking that you, too, have known the blessing of such people in your lives - and that tonight, you might want to join me in praying for them and thanking God for the gift they were in our own stories...
O Lord!
I can't count,
I can't name,
I don't even remember all the people in my life
who, by your grace and design,
came into the fiber of my life
and whose shadows have faded and disappeared...
I can't count,
I can't name,
I can't even identify all the ways the people
who touched my life,
had my back,
comforted and consoled me,
listened to me so patiently,
forgave me and forgave me and forgave me,
lifted me up and supported me,
welcomed me to share in their stories...
mended my broken heart and healed my wounds,
shared with me their wisdom,
taught me to believe and trust in myself,
helped me survive my losses, my grief,
lightened my days with laughter and joy,
made room for me in the days of their lives
and who prayed for me
and prayed with me
and for whom
I pray tonight...
Such as these, Lord,
are your angels in my life:
reminders of your presence,
messengers of mercy,
bearers of your wisdom,
harbingers of hopefulness,
icons of your vigilance,
heralds of your kindness,
instruments of peace,
prophets of your promised joy,
envoys of your counsel,
signs of your fidelity
and couriers of grace...
I pray for them, Lord,
I pray for them all:
those I remember
and those I've forgotten
and those whose blessing I failed to notice,
so gracious their presence and touch in my life...
I pray in thanksgiving to you, O Lord,
for all these too many to count or remember
for all who've blessed and anointed my life
with your love, your mercy, your peace...
Protect me, Lord, while I'm awake
and watch over me while I sleep
that awake, I might keep watch with you
and asleep, rest in your peace...
Amen.
Two songs for our prayer this evening:
the first, an old hymn, reminding us
of what a Friend we have in Jesus...
the second, a more contemporary piece,
inviting us to be grateful
for all our friends...
If a widget and video don't appear below, click here!
What A Friend We Have In Jesus
arranged by David Angerman
What a friend we have in Jesus
all our sins and griefs to bear
What a privilege to carry
What a privilege to carry
everything to God in prayer
O what peace we often forfeit
O what peace we often forfeit
O what needless pain we bear
All because we do not carry
All because we do not carry
everything to God in prayer
Have we trials and temptations
Have we trials and temptations
Is there trouble anywhere
We should never be discouraged
We should never be discouraged
take it to the Lord in prayer
Can we find a friend so faithful
Can we find a friend so faithful
who will all our sorrows share
Jesus knows our every weakness
Jesus knows our every weakness
take it to the Lord in prayer
Are we weak and heavy laden
Are we weak and heavy laden
cumbered with a load of care
Precious Savior, still our refuge
Precious Savior, still our refuge
take it to the Lord in prayer
Do thy friends despise, forsake thee
Do thy friends despise, forsake thee
Take it to the Lord in prayer
In his arms he'll take and shield thee
In his arms he'll take and shield thee
thou wilt find a solace there
