Pause for Prayer: THURSDAY 2/1

Surf Drive Beach, Falmouth, MA by Mark Penta

As January becomes February,
open my eyes, Lord,
and open my mind and heart,
my imagination and my soul,
to your power in the weather,
your presence in the stillness,
your beauty all around me...

In this shortest month of the year, Lord,
help me find the peace you offer:
   when it's cold,
       wrap me in your mercy's warmth;
   in the snow,
       cover me with saving grace;
   in the doldrums,
       help me find more time for prayer,
       time with you to grow in winter's quiet,
       in the mystery of your love for me...

As January becomes February,
open all I am, Lord, to all you have to give
and ready me for springtime
and the promise that it holds...

Amen.




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Pause for Prayer: WEDNESDAY 1/31

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Pause for Prayer: TUESDAY 1/30

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Lord,
You’ve forgiven me so many times,
over and over again,
often for the same faults and failings,
the same old sins,
my same old sins...

You’ve forgiven me so many times
and yet just today it came to my mind,
came to my heart, how
   - you never hold a grudge,
   - you never bear me any resentment,
   - you never point a scolding finger
even when I’m sure it seems
I take your mercy for granted…

I need to lean on your mercy, Lord,
I need to depend upon your forgiving heart,
I need to trust in your compassion and your love
but I never want, I never mean
to take your mercy for granted…

When I’ve done nothing to deserve it, Lord,
when all the evidence suggests another verdict,
even then your pardon comes my way:
a reprieve, a second chance,
my slate wiped clean
and the gift of grace to try again
to be more faithful to you, to your word
and to your love…

So, let me dare ask another favor, Lord,
the gift of a contrite heart:
   - true sorrow for my sins,
   - sincere regret for my repeated failures,
   - and deep gratitude for your mercy
which, in your boundless love,
you never fail to offer me…

Amen.

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Two years ago today: a weight loss update

Two years ago this morning, my friend Jim drove me into Boston to the Brigham and Women's Hospital where I was to have a laparoscopic sleeve gastrectomy.  I remember walking into the hospital and wondering what the rest of my life would be like after having this done.  On the second anniversary of my surgery I want to share again the good news of what all this has meant for me.

First the physical - because that's the easiest part to share with you. Having lost 202 pounds of my original 384, my weight has plateaued at 182 pounds. My collar size has gone from from 22 to 15.5 inches.  My waist has gone from 62 to 34 inches.  My nearly chronic back pain has virtually disappeared and I can once again distribute Communion to long lines of people on Sunday morning with no difficulty. Many people tell me they think I've grown taller - but that's partly an optical illusion generated by a thinner vertical version of my body - and the capacity to stand and walk "taller" than when I was carrying so much excess baggage with me everywhere I went.  I spend 45-60 minutes on my treadmill at least 5 days a week and often more - and I enjoy it!  I even miss it if I skip a day!  In two weeks I'll be flying to Rome with a group from my parish.  I'll only need to book one seat on the plane (I've booked two seats for years!) and I won't need to ask for a seat-belt extender.  Most significant, however, is that two years ago I would never have considered such a trip because of all the walking it will entail.

Well, that last paragraph was the part that's easy to share with you.  More difficult to put into words is the emotional, psychological, spiritual transformation I've experienced.  As I've said before, my weight loss has had a positive effect on every aspect of my existence and the interior change is even more telling than the observable physical change.  I never doubted that carrying an extra 200 pounds on my frame was problematic in many ways but it's only the shedding of those pounds that has allowed me to understand how negatively I saw myself and how much that self-image affected my psychological well-being, my ministerial life, my spiritual life and my social life.  I find myself relating to God, to prayer, to my work, to you and to myself in ways too many and too deeply personal and spiritual to put into words. 

Has this all been difficult?  I can honestly say it has not been difficult.  The procedure initiated such an immediate and significant weight loss that I knew from the beginning that this was something I would never reverse and that I would do everything possible to maintain it.  In the process my relationship to food and to eating has undergone a radical transformation.  My eating habits are very different than they were two years ago (!) but I now have new habits that are very satisfying and I don't go through life "missing" the junk I used to consume or the bad eating habits that used to define my diet.  As I've told many of you, "Nothing on the menu or on your plate is tastier or sweeter than the sweet taste of life that's now mine." 

I'm especially happy to have helped some others make the decision to have bariatric surgery.  Sharing my story with others is just one more aspect of the joy in my life. (And please know that if I can help you in any way with this decision, I'd be very pleased to do so.)

Do I wish I had done this years ago?  Indeed, I do!  Still, I'm just grateful that I've done it at all and that with God's help and the support of so many like you, I have a new lease on life, a life I hope and pray will be longer and healthier because of what I did two years ago this morning.




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Monday Morning Offering: 1/29

Coffee in the Morning by George Mendoza


(I post this every year around this time
because every year around this time
this is how I feel...)

Good morning, good God!

I come to you in a season of grays,
charcoaled in the landscape of my days,
etched by the chill of long winter nights...

I offer you this ordinary time,
this ornery wintry season,
waiting for that Ashen Wednesday
to come with Lent's relief in purpled shades...

I offer you this season in-between, Lord,
in-between the holly and the palm...

So much of life is in-between:
in-between the days gone by
and all the days that lie ahead,
in-between the old and new,

and hope and disappointment,
expectation and fulfillment...

In-between the ups and downs, 
the joy and sadness,
tears and laughter...

In-between what’s not yet done
and what is not yet known...

In-between what I can’t let go
and what I hardly dare to dream…

I offer you this moment, Lord,
this day that's in-between
and in a season in-between:
I offer you this day, Lord,
the only time I truly have to offer...

Help me keep it in today, Lord,
help me stay in the moment,
make me mindful of what is...

Give me serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
to change the things I can
and wisdom to know the difference…

Give me patience with the past, Lord,
and hope for all that's yet to come...

Help me trust you'll not abandon me,
that you will not forsake me,
that you are always with me as you are today,
in-between what’s been and what is yet to be…

I offer you this one day
twixt yesterday and tomorrow,
the day that you have made, O Lord,
the day you come to meet me,
to challenge and forgive me,
to strengthen and to comfort me...

Give me the grace this day
to meet all those who cross my path
as I'd have them meet me:
with patience and with peace….

I offer you this season of grays,
charcoaled in the landscape of my days,
etched by the chill of long winter nights...

I offer you this ordinary time,
this ornery wintry season,
waiting for Ash Wednesday
and the purpled shades of Lent's relief...

I offer you this season in-between, Lord,
in-between the holly and the palm...

I offer you the in-between...

Amen.


 

   
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Homily for January 28

Homily for the Fourth Sunday in Ordinary Tine
(Scriptures for today's Mass)

Audio for homily

There’s no doubting that Jesus lived in simpler times,

and long before science and psychology gave explanations

for unusual human behavior.

You and I might wonder if the man in the synagogue was actually

 “possessed by an unclean spirit”

or if he was pathologically, mentally imbalanced.

Which ever was the case, there’s no doubting that either

Jesus cast out a demon or healed the man of his illness.

In such instances, those around Jesus did not doubt

the authenticity of what he did - they didn’t think it was a trick.

Rather, what puzzled the people there

was the source of Jesus’s power to do what he did:

did it come from God - or from the dark side?

And that’s the turning point in today’s gospel story.

Those who witnessed how the Lord helped this troubled man

begin to believe that Jesus’ power comes from God

and thus “his fame spread everywhere,

throughout the whole region of Galilee.”

I wonder: had we been there - would our response have been the same?
Would we have recognized and welcomed Jesus’ teaching
and his authority over whatever has a hold on us?
What holds us hostage is not likely to be an unclean spirit, a demon,

but the question remains:

do we welcome Jesus’ authority over whatever else it might be
that possesses our hearts, minds and deeds hostage

- and leaves us in need of healing?

We live in a culture often suspicious of any authority
outside, beyond the personal authority of the self.
Over the past 50 years, we’ve moved from upholding and respecting

religious, political and institutional authority as beyond questioning
to a reverence of the self
as the primary arbiter of truth and morality.

Certainly religion, the political establishment and our institutions

have given us more than enough reason to question their authority.

But what if any system of checks and balances

do you and I employ or submit to

in order to monitor our own personal authority?

Does anything or anyone serve to warn us

when our personal authority begins to serve not God or a higher good

but instead our own self-interest and weaknesses?
 

The authority of a social order based on love of

God, nation and family,
(rooted in church, patriotism and tradition)
has largely given way to a society struggling to defend
every individual’s supposed right to radical personal autonomy

and this, often at the expense of the common good
and with serious consequences for the rights of the most vulnerable:

the poor, the marginalized, those not yet born.

So, a few questions to consider…

• What authority do I give Jesus over my own authority?
over my own decisions and choices

- and the processes by which I make them?
• What authority do I give Jesus over whatever possesses me,

that is to say, whatever holds me in its grip?

What authority do I give Jesus over my weaknesses,

my desires, my selfishness, my fears, my laziness,  my anxieties,

over any of the unhealthy habits that often “possess”

my imaginations, our hearts, our minds and our desires?
• What authority do we give to Jesus’ teachings

over our marriages, our family life, how we raise our children?

What authority do we give to Jesus’ teachings

at work and in the world of our finances?

• What authority do I give Jesus over my ministry

and over how I pastor this parish?
• What authority do we give to Jesus’ teachings
over how we exercise our individual rights as citizens
and our participation in our nation’s democratic process?
• What authority do we give Jesus over our possessions:
over how we get what we have? how we use what we have?
how we share what we have?

There are many such questions for us to ask
and not the least of them would be a question
about the authority of the Church in our lives.

Catholic Christians acknowledge the authority of Jesus
not only in the scriptures and in a personal relationship with him
but also through the communion of the Church, Christ’s body,
and through the teachings of the Church.

That the strength of the Church’s authority has suffered
from the a sea change in the cultural climate is a given
and that reality has only been exacerbated by any ways

in which the Church has compromised it’s own authority
through its words and deeds, through its silence and passivity.

We need take care not to miss the importance of the venue

in today’s gospel.

It’s in the synagogue,  in the house of prayer where the rabbis teach,
it’s in the place of worship that the authority of Jesus is

revealed, recognized and received.
Yes, Jesus preached by the seashore and on hillsides
but his authority did not estrange itself

from his own religious institution
which was not without its problems and divisions.
Jesus did not ignore the religious authority of his time:
he engaged it, challenged it and expanded it.

• So perhaps the first question we may need to ask is this:
will you and I submit to any authority greater than our own?
• How can you and I work to balance the value of personal authority
with the value of an authority greater than our own?
• What authority, whose authority do you and I

recognize, respect and reverence?
• Will we invite the teaching of Jesus, and of his Church:
- to speak with authority to our hearts and minds?
- to have authority over realities that hold us hostage
to ideology, to creature comfort, to the self?

As surely as Jesus stood up in the synagogue at Capernaum,
he stands among us here, this morning

and speaks to us in the scriptures
and he joins us at the altar where, in the Eucharist,
we acknowledge him to be the Holy One of God.

Through the power of his Spirit
and with the authority of the Cross,
the authority of his sacrificial love,
Jesus is revealed and reverenced

in the bread and cup of the altar.

May the Holy One we receive here
have authority over our minds and hearts
and make us one with his body, the Church.

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Pause for Prayer: SUNDAY 1/28

Image source

This song is part of my morning prayer every day of the week.
God knows I need daily help in seeking and finding the narrow way
and this song at least gets me heading in the right direction every morning!


-->

Blessed are the poor in spirit,
longing for their Lord,
for God's coming kingdom shall be theirs.
Blessed are the sorrowing,
for they shall be consoled,
and the meek shall come to rule the world.

Lead me, Lord, lead me, Lord,

by the light of truth

to seek and to find the narrow way.

Be my way; be my truth; be my life, my Lord,

and lead me, Lord, today.

Blessed are the merciful,
for mercy shall be theirs,
and the pure in heart shall see their God.
Blest are they whose hunger
only holiness can fill,
for I say they shall be satisfied.

Blest are they who through their lifetimes
sow the seeds of peace;
all will call them children of the Lord.
Blest are you, though persecuted
in your holy life,
for in heaven, great is your reward.

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Pause for Prayer: SATURDAY 1/28

Photo by Tee M Em

I came across this photo on FaceBook where the poster,
a friend of a friend, captioned this scene in her backyard:
     Once in a while you're shown the light, 
     in the strangest of places,
     if you look just right...

All light comes from you, Lord,
a light no darkness can extinguish
for in you there is no darkness...

And it's your desire, Lord,
to share your light with us, always -
even though sometimes
our own clouds shadow and obscure 
the light you always shine upon us...

Still, once in a while, we see the light
and sometimes in the strangest of places
- if we look just right...

You show us your light
right in our own backyards,
right in the sky just above our homes,
right in our own hearts and minds,
right on the path we walk,
right there in the love we share -
if only we look just right...

You never fail to shine and share your light, Lord,
and sometimes we find and see it
in the strangest yet most commonplace of venues -
if we look just right...

So open our thoughts to your light, Lord,
open our hearts to your brightness,
shed your light upon our path
lest we trip and fall in our own darkness,
lest we miss the light you shine on us always,
the light we find, the light see
when we look just right...

Amen.


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Pause for Prayer: FRIDAY 1/26

Thawing Snow by Edvard Munch

So cold today, Lord,
with the wind's keen edge
cutting through my jacket and scarf,
my earmuffs and hat...

But "sunny and in the 50's come this weekend"
or so the weather folk report -
and I pray they're right
in predicting some relief, a hint,
a taste of April, months away but nonetheless
hoped for, longed for and dearly missed
as we make our way through winter
who makes her way through us...

Our hearts have seasons, too,
(you know them well, Lord)
seasons frigid with shorter days
and longer nights waiting in vigil
for the sun to rise, to come again
and warm us and the earth
until the gardens bloom and we're set free
from winter's chilling hold...

So give us, Lord, we pray,
a weekend's respite in our hearts
and kindle there your fire of love, warming us
with promise of the spring you'll surely bring
to bear upon our hearts,
to touch and thaw and melt us
with your Spirit's saving breath...

Amen.



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Pause for Prayer: THURSDAY 1/25

Image source

(A friend posted the quote above on her FaceBook page
and I love how concisely and accurately
it sums up so much!)

Lord, there's so much "I don't get,"
so much I don't understand...

So many things are a mystery to me,
so many things confound and confuse me
and sometimes make me
a little bit crazy!

There's so much, Lord, there's too much
I just can't/// wrap my head around -
or my mind or my heart or my soul...

That's why I need to remember
and why I hope
and certainly why I want to trust:
that you completely understand
everything I don't get;
- that nothing's a mystery to you
     (though often you're a mystery to me);
- that in the midst of all crazy confusion
     you've got my back,
     you're on my side,
     you're at my right hand (and on my left)
- that together with you
there's nothing I can't face and endure...

So even when I say,
"God, I don't get this"
I know you've got this, Lord,
and I know you've got me...

Amen.


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Pause for Prayer: WEDNESDAY 1/24

Could be the Lord missed me yesterday
and the day before yesterday
and the day before that
and the week before that...

Even when I don't check in,
(nope, not a word!)
the Lord is always trying to reach me,
listen to me and help me:
and the truth is - I need that!

So, yes... on those days (or weeks) 
when the Lord is missing me,
I'm missing the Lord, too,
and missing out on what I need...

Texting with God
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Pause for Prayer: TUESDAY 1/23

Just musing, Lord, on simple things
to which I could pay more attention
and for which I should be more grateful...

Things like:
   a crisp, sunny day in January,
   a friend's touch on my shoulder
   a hint of your presence beside me
   the freedom in which I live
   the beauty of my friend's new grandchild
   catching up with an old friend
   the light of the moon and the stars
   a bed to sleep in
   good dreams
   a morning shower
   warm ear muffs
   breakfast, lunch and dinner
   good music, well played and sung
   sunlight
   clouds
   and rain
   flowers blooming
   memories, memories, memories
   crops growing
   cold drinks on hot days
   hot chocolate on cold days
   your forgiving my sins
   a hot shower, a clean shave
   finally doing what needs to be done
   the loyalty of family and friends 
   a day with no bad news
   lapping waves at the shore
   seeing an old friend at Sunday mass
   a sleeping baby
   remembering what I'd forgotten
   a child at play
   word that my friend feels better
   something to look forward to
   naps
   telling the truth when it's hard
   a friend who has my back
   the satisfaction of a job well done
   soft rain
   quiet time, silent time
   a cup of Rocky Mountain Morning tea
   a word when I'm desperate to hear one
   time spent in prayer
   a real letter in the mail
   seeing my work bear fruit
   my morning omelette and salsa
   getting anything done on time
   serving an other's needs
   seeking and finding what's true
   a good night's sleep
   picking up my dry cleaning
   a Monday holiday
   my parish men's group
   doing what I know I should do
   the grace of God
   laundry done, folded, put away
   the patience others have with me
   leaving behind what's foolish
   the sounds of my parish at prayer
   trusting that all shall be well
   doing the next right thing
   cashews and peanuts
   exchanging smiles with a stranger
   making peace my neighbor
   making peace with you
   making peace with myself
   pausing for prayer every day
   staying right in the moment
   living one day at a time
   remembering your love for me...

Just musing, Lord, on simple things
to which I could pay more attention
and for which I should be more grateful...

For all these gifts
and for bringing them to mind,
thank you, Lord!

Amen.



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Monday Morning Offering: 1/22

Coffee in the Morning by George Mendoza

Good morning, good God!

I’m looking at the week ahead, Lord,

and wondering 'bout the ups and downs,

the twists and turns my path might take

these last days in January...

What joys will bring a smile to my face,

and lift my heart, reminding me again

that you’re my God, that you are near

to hold me in your love?

Will I find that inner peace to strengthen me

when the road is steep, my step unsure

and I fear I’ve lost my way to you?

When my chin droops upon my chest,

remind me of the joy of good times past

and lift my face to yours, Lord…

Let no grace or gift from you escape my notice,

but rather:
open my eyes, my ears, my heart

to your presence and your peace,

all day, every day this week...

And I wonder:

what sorrow might come my way this week,

what worry weigh upon my mind,

what sadness cloud my sight, my trust, my hope...

If there comes a day or night, Lord, 

when I’m tempted to give up, to give in

to thoughts that threaten peace of mind and heart,

restore and strengthen all my trust in you…

If this wintry week takes me through a valley

dark in shadows, cold,

shepherd me, Lord, and guide me

with your strong and outstretched arm

and hold me in the warmth of your embrace…

How many times this week, Lord,
will you come to me

in the lives and faces,
in the needs of those around me?

Will I recognize your face? 

Will I know it’s you who stands before me?

Will I tend and care for you in others

as I pray you tend and care for me through them?

Open my heart wide to your presence all around me:

make me generous in sharing

what I have and who I am

with those who cross my path, wherever I might meet them…

What changes will come this week, Lord?

What choices will I need to make

and how will those decisions change my day,

my week, this new year, my life?

What will surprise me this week, Lord?

What unexpected situations, twists and turns,

will sit me down or stand me on my head

as this new week unfolds before me?

Whatever comes my way, Lord,

remind me that there’s nothing
you and I can’t handle together:

you, close by my side,
with your mercy, grace and help...

I’m thinking of the week ahead and I’m wondering, Lord:

how often will you call me to prayer?

how often will I hear you?

how often will I accept your invitation?

Will I make a place and a time each day
for us to meet, just the two of us:

a time to sit together, to share the peace of silence

a time for me to speak from my heart’s depths

and cares and fears and hopes?

a time for me to listen for the word you speak

to help me walk in faith the path that’s mine,

the way that leads to you?

I’m thinking of the week ahead, Lord,
and hoping and praying 

I’ll be more faithful to you,
more constant in my prayer, 

more generous in my giving,

more loving and forgiving
in my words and in my deeds…

I’m thinking of the days ahead, Lord,
and offer you this prayer:

be with me through this week,
be with me day by day,
be with me night by night,
be with me one day at a time,
be with me, Lord,
be with me, Lord, 
I pray...

Amen.

 

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Homily for January 21

Image source

Homily for the Third Sunday in Ordinary Time
(Scriptures for today's Mass)

Audio for homily

--> At first glance, the way Simon, Andrew, James and John
respond to Jesus’ call may seem extraordinary:
they just drop everything and head off in a new direction.
If that’s proposed to us as an example for how we might live,
it may seem impractical, even impossible.


But what’s really happening here is something we all experience
when there’s a change in the “ordering principle” of our lives,
a change in whatever or, more importantly, whomever
is at the center of our existence.


Do you think you haven’t experienced this?


• Remember, then, the first time you fell in love
and how that one, other person began to occupy
your heart, your mind, your dreams, your hopes, your plans.


• Remember how the ordering principle of your life changed,
again, when you got engaged.


• Remember how your world was reordered
when you learned that you were expecting a child.


• Remember how the whole universe
seemed never the same again
after you lost someone you deeply loved.


• Think of how your work, your job,
can be the ordering principle in your life
and how everything’s thrown off kilter if you lose your job.


• Think about the way your family
is the ordering principle in your life,
how your life revolves around the needs and desires,
the ups and downs of the people in your family,
how your own daily plan is organized
around the school schedules
and sports calendars of your children.

• Or perhaps you’re single or not raising any children.
While some might presume you live an easy and care-free life,
you know how quickly any vacuum of time and energy is filled
by work and worry, by responsibilities and relationships.


• And who doesn’t realize how easily our finances
take over as the ordering principle in our lives.


Perhaps the account in the gospel
tells the story just as it happened:
Jesus happens by Simon and Andrew, James and John
and says, “Come, follow me.” And off they go!


Or perhaps this scene is more like a still shot from a video,
intended to sum up a larger story.

Think of a photo of a newly married couple,
holding their hands forward
and looking together at their wedding rings.

The picture gives us only a moment
but tells the story of a relationship years in the making,
a relationship that will reorder the couple’s lives
until death parts them.


Whether it's "love at first sight"
or a relationship that grows day by day, over years,
it's the love at the center of our hearts that orders our lives.


For us to give serious consideration to this gospel story
we’ll need to spend some time discerning
what’s presently the ordering principle in our lives.
(This is a good question for anyone to ask
and it’s certainly a question for believers.)


Sometimes we may presume that the love we're pledged to
is what orders our lives
but there are many times when other realities and lesser loves
hedge the one we may name as most important.


• For a pastor like me,
Christ should be the ordering principle of my life.
But what if my work, even my work for Christ, consumes me -
such that there’s little or no time left for my prayer life,
no time left for me to grow in my relationship with Jesus…


• Certainly the same can be said of the married person
consumed by work – work to support a beloved family.
But if that work is consuming to the degree
that one has little time left to spend with the family...


Well, you see how it can go...


Perhaps the key to our understanding this gospel passage,
to understanding how these four men
left behind their familiar, day-to-day lives,
the key is to ask ourselves the question:
Who’s at the heart of my heart’s deepest desire?

For whom will I drop everything else
and leave behind other, even critically important, realities
to be faithful to the one who is the heart of my heart?

What is so precious to me
that I would let go everything in favor of such a beloved?


On a wedding day, on an ordination day,
these answers may come quickly and easily.
As time goes by, the answers may change
and the questions may be harder to answer.


St. Paul called us today to reexamine everything in our lives:
our loves, our marriages,
the tears of our grief, the laughter of our joy,
and everything we have and possess and use
and to know, to understand that all of this - will pass away
until all that remains will be the love of God for us.


Make no mistake about it: the Lord asks to be The One
for whom we would be willing to put everything else aside.

No,
we’re not called to choose between God and those we love.

Very often, more often than not, loving those closest to us
loving those for whom we’re responsible
is precisely how we express our love for God.
But even here, there can be too much of a good thing
if my dedication to my loved ones begins to drain
the vitality of my relationship with the Lord.


But, as he was with Jonah, the reluctant prophet,
so is the Lord with us.
He continues to call us to lay aside what we’re doing,
to abandon the nets that entangle our priorities,
and to follow him, to be with him,
to spend our lives with him and for him.


We gather each week in the shadow of the cross of Jesus,
the great sign that reminds us that he let go,
laid down everything for us
- for he loved us more than life itself.

At this table every week the Lord invites us,
calls us again and again
to be filled with his life in the bread and cup of the Eucharist
and to follow him along the path of our hearts’ desire.


Listen for his voice:
as he called Jonah, as he called Peter, Andrew, James and John,
so he calls each of us by name: he calls,
Chris, Judy, Al, Mary, John, Jorge, Pat,
Peggy, Bill, Elizabeth, Jimmy…

He calls,  “Come, follow me…”


To all of us, to each of us, to every one of us, he calls out,
“Come, follow me!”

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